THE GOOD OLD SOUTH!

[TAR1]

Southern FOLKS know their summer weather report: Humidity
Humidity
> Humidity
> *
> Southern FOLKS know their vacation spots: The beach
> The rivuh
> The creek
> *
> Southern WOMEN know everybody's first name: Honey
> Darlin'
> Shugah
> *
> Southern WOMEN know the movies that speak to their hearts: Fried Green
> Tomatoes
> Driving Miss Daisy
> Steel Magnolias
> Gone With The Wind
> *
> Southern FOLKS know their religions:
> Baptist
> Methodist
> Football
> *
> Southern FOLKS know their cities dripping with Southern charm: Chawl'stn
> S'vanah
> Foat Wuth
> N'awlins
> Addlanna
> *
> Southern WOMEN know their elegant gentlemen: Men in uniform
> Men in tuxedos
> Rhett Butler
> *
> Southern girls know their prime real estate: The Mall
> The Country Club
> The Beauty Salon
> *
> Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins:
> Having bad hair and nails
> Having bad manners
> Cooking bad food
> *
> Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a
> conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.
> *
> Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens,
> peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."
> *
> Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of
> "yonder."
> *
> Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, as in: "Going to
> town, be back directly."
> ("Dreckly" in my family)
> *
> Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for
> the white, granular, sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl
> in the middle of the table. *
> All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the
> term, but they know the concept well.
> *
> Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace
> for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a
> big bowl of cold potato salad.
> *
> If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a
> large banana puddin'!
> *
> Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and
> "a right fer piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1
> mile or 20.
> *
> Only a Southerner both knows and understands the difference between a
> redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
> *
> No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn
> signal is actually going to make a turn.
> *
> A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an
> adverb.
> *
> Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, .... and when
> we're "in line", we talk to everybody!
> *
> Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're
> related, even if only by marriage.
> *
> In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
> *
> Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
> *
> Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, biscuits, and
> coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast
> food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
> *
> When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you
> are in the presence of a genuine
> Southerner!
> *
> Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea
> indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea
> unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
> *
> And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old
> ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway.
> You just say,"Bless her heart"... and go your own way.
> *
> To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness:
> Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the
> morning, bless your heart!
> *
> And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all
> this Southern stuff......bless your hearts, I hear they're fixin' to
> have classes on Southernness as a second language!
> *
> Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are fahevah !
> *
> Now Shugah, send this to someone who was raised in the South or wish
> they had been! If you're a Northern transplant, bless your little heart,
> fake it. We know you got here as fast as you could

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Dem is sho' nuff some truisms!

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